Department of the Navy Announces Names of Three New Virginia Class Submarines

The Secretary of the Navy Donald C. Winter announced today, 30JAN08, the official names of three Virginia-class submarines: USS Missouri, USS California, and USS Mississippi. According to the new release, the names were selected to,

“honors the continuous support of the military by the people of the ‘Show Me State,’ and its leaders;” “honors the [...]

Lost Returns: New Season Begins 31JAN08

The story of the recalcitrant guests of Alvar Hanso, founder of The Hanso Foundation, continues with a two-hour premier on 31JAN08. The sojourn in at the island maintained by Dharma Industries will be recapped to bring new viewers up to date. With the rest of network television paralyzed by the writer’s strike, this [...]

USC Football Recruiting: 2009 Top Prospect Matt Barkley Commits

The 2007-08 Gatorade National Football Player of the Year Matt Barkley, quarterback from Mater Dei High School, has committed to becoming a Trojan. The 6-foot 3, 220-pound Barkley is the first junior to win the award. Barkley made he decision to announce his decision after visiting USC on 19JAN08.

Barkley will not be eligible [...]

Haditha Update: Lt Andrew Grayson Arraigned

First Lieutenant Andrew Grayson was arraigned on 23JAN08. Note: it is not uncommon for accused to reserve pleas, it is the norm. For more information on Haditha.
yojoe out

College Football Games Lead To Fan Violence: More Violence After Upset

A recent study from the University of Colorado finds that game days result in an increased number of assaults, liquor law violations, and assaults. It is rather fitting that this study would come out of CU given the anarchy that erupted during the Buff’s 2005 loss to the Nuskers. Yes, the study [...]

Norm Chow To UCLA As Offensive Coordinator

Former USC offensive coordinator – and man who many said the Trojans would fail without – Norm Chow has been hired by UCLA. We will see what he can do against Brian Cushing, Rey Maualuga, and Taylor Mays.
What is it about Chow that no school ever wants him as a head coach?
yojoe Fight [...]

Michael Nifong Files For Backruptcy

Anyone who is a fan of Duke lacrosse or Rule 8.4 of the Model Rules of Professional Conduct, will not be despondent over the news that Michael Byron Nifong, former district attorney for Durham County, NC, has filed for bankruptcy. Mr. Nifong lists his total assets at $243,898 and total liabilities at $180,311,978. [...]

Surgical Skills Improved By Using Nintendo Wii

If you are about to go under for a surgical procedure and see you doctor playing Super Mario Galaxy on a Nintendo Wii, there is nothing to fear. Yo may just be just warming up for your upcoming procedure.

According to NewScientistTech, a new study shows that surgical residents performed better after playing the Wii.

To [...]

Upgrades To President’s Helicopter To Cost Additional One Billion Dollars

According to Aviation Week, the Navy, specifically the Marine Corps, will stick with the US 101, aka the VH-71, helicopter for the helicopter version of Air Force One, known as Marine One. The upgrades will cost an additional $1 billion, on top of the original $6.1 billion price tag. The Navy had also [...]

Air Force Terrified Of Ghosts: Calls in Ghost Hunters

Wright-Patterson Air Force Base houses the Air Force Research Laboratory, which is at the cutting edge of warfighting technologies in air, space, and cyberspace. The base also houses some poltergeists, wraiths, and unexplained phenomena. In response to these apparitions the Air Force has called in The Atlantic Paranormal Society (TAPS) to investigate.
We can [...]

Steroid Scandal Spreads To Rap World

The clear and the cream may help Jason Giambi go yard or Shawne Merriman stop the run, but can these substances help 50 Cent spit mad rhymes or Mary J. Blige warble? Evidently steroids are hip hop performance enhancers.
An ongoing steroid probe in New York a number of stars are involved, including Mary J. [...]

Prostitution In Chicago: Starting Wage $27 Per Hour

Female residents of The Second City have a tremendous occupational opportunity, with earnings of up to $20,000 per year. The job: prostitution. This according to a recent paper by Professor Steve Levitt, the coauthor of Freakonomics. The paper details the economics of prostitution in Chicago. The author’s approach, along [...]

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chipmunk

japanese tetris

He likes turtles

babby buffallo

Jonathan Lee Riches© v. Viagra, Cialis, Levitra, Et Al

Jonathan Lee Riches© (he asserts his names is copyrighted) he is an inmate at Federal Correctional Institution (FCI) Williamsburg, SC with a penchant for litigation. He has now sued Viagra, Cialis, and Levitra. The best part of his lawsuit:

Also Defendant’s are encouraging homosexuality in Federal Prisons, using subliminal messaging.

The thought of an inmate [...]

Federal Government Sued For Three Quadrillion Dollars For Katrina Damage

A resident of Baker, Louisiana has sued the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers for $3 quadrillion in damages as a result of hurricane Katrina. This plaintiff puts to shame Jonathan Lee Riches©, the inmate who gained prominence by suing Michael Vick for 63 billion dollars. To put the figure in some perspective, a [...]

Yo: The New Gender-Neutral Pronoun

Anybody who spends time writing is, at one time or another, vexed by the lack of a gender-neutral (should read sex-neutral) pronoun in the English language. Attempts have been made to overcome this problem either by avoiding indefinite pronouns, or by the use of his or her or his/her. Both of these fixes [...]

Chinese Jin-Class SSBN: Photo

From ArmsControlWonk.com comes another picture of China’s new Jin-class nuclear-powered ballistic missile submarine. A picture of the sub on Google Earth was previously posted here.

Carbon Tax: We Need To Save Us From Ourselves

If you see this man, stop him. Don’t let him make any decisions for himself. He is incapable of independent thought, self-control, or forbearance. He will doubtlessly be seen eating glass, gawking at the sun, or snorting Ajax. You see, none of these activities is taxed, so he will engage in [...]

Global Warming Slow To Hit California

The storm could also dump more than 10 feet of snow on California mountains by Sunday. Blizzard warnings were in effect for mountainous areas.
It appears that climate change and global warming have not arrived in California.
yojoe out
P.S. The CNN story mentions the song “California Dreamin’” While growing up in the Sierras I would [...]

Jonathan Lee Riches© v. Johnny Knoxville, Bam Margera, Steve-O

The JLR has now sued the men who brought us Jackass. In his latest lawsuit, the JLR claims that Johnny Knoxville has been prank calling him at FCI Williamsburg. Who would have thought that Jonathan Lee Riches© and the work jackass would appear on the same document?
yojoe© out

Q-Ray Ionized Bracelet Is Blather, Bunk, Poppycock, And A Fraud: According To The Seventh Circuit

On 3JAN07, the Seventh Circuit handed down a ruling against the makers of the Q-Ray Ionized Bracelet. The opinion is authored by Chief Judge F. H. Easterbrook, and as with many of the chief judge’s opinions, is well worth the read. He even links to Wired Blog in the opinion.
The opinion affirms [...]